A re-cut trailer, or retrailer is a parody trailer for a movie created by editing footage from that movie or from its original trailers, and thus are a form of mashup. They generally derive humor from misrepresenting the original film: for instance, a film with a murderous plot is made to look like a comedy, or vice versa. They became popular on the Internet in 2005.
- Wikipedia

Jerod at Midwest Sports Fan posted his list of The 15 Best Re-cut Movie Trailers:

One of the most clever and entertaining memes I’ve come across is the practice of re-cutting famous movies to create new, usually wonderfully ironic trailers.

Since there is nothing better to this morning, I have painstakingly watched as many of these re-cut trailers as I could find, sifted through the crap, and will now proudly present you with the following list of the best re-cut movie trailers.

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Popularity: 5%

Recently David Madison posted an article on Unreality Magazine listing The Most Memorable Fictional Drugs in Movies and Television. The list itself is interesting, and I have to admit the author did a fine job finding screen captures for each of the drugs mentioned.

However, I had the feeling that there must be other well-known, fictional drugs in cinema. A little bit of research (thanks to Google and Wikipedia) turned up a plethora of pharmaceuticals the author neglected to mention…
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Popularity: 8%

“Wait a minute. You aren’t seriously suggesting that if I get through the wire… and case everything out there… and don’t get picked up… to turn myself in and get thrown back in the cooler for a couple of months so you can get the information you need?”
– Steve McQueen, The Great Escape

Most guys enjoy a good prison break film. The stories capture the notions of freedom and the indomitable human spirit. One of my favorites is The Great Escape starring the uber-cool Steve McQueen. That said, few movies are set entirely in prisons, so I, like others, are kind of curious what the criteria were when Gunaxin assembled their list of The 15 Best Prison Movies. Was The Rock not included simply because it takes place at a decommissioned prison? And does not enough of Malcolm X take place in a prison? And what about Assault on Precinct 13, is it because it has more to do with holding cells than prisons?
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Popularity: 100%

“He looks determined… without being ruthless. There’s something heroic
about him. He doesn’t look like a killer. He comes across so calm…
acts like he has a dream… eyes full of passion.” – The Killer (1989)

Assassin movies are a guaranteed hit with moviegoers. And for some reason, we too often cheer on this ‘bad guy.’ Why?

Hitmen are the inevitable descendants of our Western gunslingers like Gregory Peck in The Gunfighter (1950) or Alan Ladd in Shane(1953). Even when those films were made, there was acknowledgement that such killers had already outlived their usefulness and had no place in civilized society. But modern cinema isn’t so “civilized,” because professional killers are thriving in it. The reason is most likely that hitmen are ‘cool’ because, like rebels, vampires, psychopaths, and Lords of the Sith, they operate totally outside of societal norms and do whatever they want. Such freedom is enviable, but naturally not the sort of behavior most people would think of emulating. That’s sort of the basic pleasure of cinema: escapism.

In the vein of celebrating these anti-heroes, Movie Trailer Talk has compiled the “Top 10 Badass Hitmen Movies” (summaries added from IMDb):

1. Léon aka The Professional (1994) – Leon is a first-class hit man, but is also a sensitive guy who loves his potted plants. He is moral: “No women, no children” is his professional motto. He is sympathetic to his neighbor, Mathilda, a typically rebellious twelve-year-old who has trouble with her family. But when her father runs afoul of drug kingpin Norman Stansfield, Mathilda turns to Leon for assistance.
2. Pulp Fiction (1994) – Jules and Vincent work as hitmen for crime boss Marcellus Wallace. Wallace is currently dealing with Butch Collidge, a boxer who failed to throw a fight after taking Wallace’s money and is now planning to flee the city, but can’t leave his father’s watch behind. Vincent faces some problems of his own when Wallace asks him to show his wife Mia a good time while he’s away. Some of these people redeem themselves and some don’t, and all meet an end appropriate to their choices.
3. El Mariachi (1992), Desperado (1995), Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003) – El Mariachi just wants to play his guitar and carry on the family tradition. Unfortunately, the town he tries to find work in has another visitor…a killer who carries his guns in a guitar case. The drug lord and his henchmen mistake El Mariachi for the killer, Azul, and chase him around town trying to kill him and get his guitar case.
4. Dip huet seung hung aka The Killer (1989) – A violent Hong Kong action film, this is the story of an assassin,
   Jeffrey Chow (aka Mickey Mouse) who takes one last job so he can retire
   and care for his girlfriend Jenny. When his employers betray him, he
   reluctantly joins forces with Inspector Lee (aka Dumbo), the cop who is
   pursuing him. Together, the new friends face the final confrontation of
   the gangsters out to kill them.
5. Kill Bill Vol. I, II (2003, 2004) – The lead character, called ‘The Bride,’ was a member of the Deadly
   Viper Assassination Squad, lead by her lover ‘Bill.’ Upon realizing she
   was pregnant with Bill’s child, ‘The Bride’ decided to escape her life
   as a killer. She fled to Texas, met a young man, and on the day of
   their wedding was gunned down by an angry and jealous Bill (with the
   assistance of the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad). Four years later,
   ‘The Bride’ wakes from a coma, and discovers her baby is gone. She,
   then, decides to seek revenge upon the five people who destroyed her
   life and killed her baby. (more…)

Popularity: 15%

“You just can’t find good paranormal help, these days.”

Release: 2006
Runtime: 1 hour, 35 min
Genre: Horror, Thriller
Language: English
MPAA Rating: R
Starring: Dominic Purcell, Josie Maran, Clare Kramer, Marcus Thomas, Tchéky Karyo , Megahn Perry

Amazon Link: The Gravedancers

SYNOPSIS: Three twenty-somethings learn the hard way about proper cemetery behavior in this independent horror film by Mike Mendez. Harris (Dominic Purcell), Sid (Marcus Thomas), and Kira (Josie Maran) are three longtime friends reunited when their college pal, Devin, dies in an auto accident. After attending Devin’s funeral, the three stage an impromptu, graveside wake. Before long, the revelers are singing and dancing around the cemetery, trampling nearby graves. Later, the friends discover they’ve made a serious mistake; they’ve awakened very angry spirits.

After watching several films from 2006’s Horrorfest, I was really beginning to doubt that there was anything redeeming about the group. For the most part the collection is a compendium of artless, cheap rip-offs, studio hybrids, and needless remakes, none of which demonstrate much success in scaring audiences. The sole exception so far has been Mendez’s The Gravedancers, a breath of competently fresh air. From the brutally shocking opening scene through to the Evil Dead-esque CGI finale, this is indie sports scares the likes of which we seldom see. The script is fresh and somewhat clever, the performances are for the most part solid (Marcus Thomas would be the sole exception), the production values are good, and the score is great – particularly for an indie production.

The film’s story is fairly simple: Dominic Purcell (of Prison Break and Blade: Trinity) plays Harris McKay, a successful lawyer who lives with his wife Allison (Clare Kramer) in wedded bliss. But when an old friend dies in a car crash and Harris is reunited with his old college pals Kira (Josie Maran) and Sid (Marcus Thomas), their lives go from paradisiacal to paranormal. Kira, Harris, and Sid visit their pal’s grave in the middle of the night, drink and reminisce, and find a strange card with an oddly apropos poem; caught up in the moment, the group read and dances in tribute to their friend. Little do they know the words on the black card were not harmless; they’ve accidentally activated an ancient “gravedancing curse” that will make their lives a living hell.

There are many horror movie no-nos such as don’t go in the dark basement, and stuff like that. Here is another one: If you find a strange card in a graveyard, don’t read it aloud. This brings me to one of the few problems I have with the film. These people are obviously not teens, what we’re dealing with here are supposedly young adults. You would think these people… who seem to be in their mid 20s, wouldn’t even be taking part in shenanigans like these. Who goes to a cemetery for a freaking nightcap? If one of your friends suggests such a thing… maybe it’s time to seek out some new friends.

From that point, things start quietly enough, with a few strange sounds here and there and the tendency of doors to open and close on their own. Soon there’s someone playing the piano when no one’s in the living room and a strange, female nutjob appears in Harris’ bedroom vanishing into thin air. When Harris and Allison contact the others, they find that Kira has been beaten and sexually assaulted, and Sid has a team of paranormal scientists in his apartment investigating a series of spontaneous fires.

The paranormal experts explain that the three have disturbed the spirits upon whose graves they danced, and those ghosts (a jealous woman with an axe, ten-year-old boy who burned to death in a fire he started, and a psychotic rapist) have one lunar cycle to exact their revenge. As the attacks become more frequent and more violent, the bonds between the three friends give way to old jealousies and petty rivalry.

Second complaint: Although the ghost/creature designs are rather chilling and off the wall, the ghosts from House on Haunted Hill (1999) and 13 Ghosts were far more aggressive and dangerous than these three phantoms. You would expect them to be making these peoples lives a living hell. Instead, they seem more content with screwing with their heads. This is explained away later on in the film when Karyo’s character Vincent tells the group that the ghosts will become more violent as the curse’s cycle nears it’s end.

The paranormal experts might have a way to reverse the curse – but will they complete the ritual in time, and will it even work? As things get more desperate and the spirits get stronger, things get far more complicated than expected – soon enough there are explosions, crashes, flying objects, possessions, and enough assorted spectral misconduct to put Hell House to shame.

The Gravedancers has many things going for it. For one, it’s a “grown-up” horror movie that trades in sex-crazed emo teens for slightly older, more fleshed-out characters. They’re also more complex and likeable than your standard horror victims. The characters go through a number of harrowing events and for the most part, their reactions to the increasingly bizarre things happening to them are believably realistic. There’s a nice balance of sensible curiosity and legitimate panic that rings true on numerous levels. Purcell is a grounding force as the somewhat inexpressive, stubborn Harris (his character was the first to settle down), and the more colorful characters play off him nicely.

As Horrorfest’s rose among several thorns, The Gravedancers, is a solid addition to the haunting subgenre. Fans of spooky classics like Poltergeist, Legend of Hell House, and even The Entity will find this film right up their alley.

Goozlepipe Rating:Really Liked It

Popularity: 4%